Personal Growth¶

Who am I?

In the next year, this blog will be painted with a mix of technical machine learning content and personal notes. I've spent more of my 20s thinking about my life than machine learning. I'm not good at either, but I enjoy both.

Life story

I was born in a village in China. My parents were the children of rural farmers who grew up during the Cultural Revolution. They were the first generation of their family to read and write, and also the first generation to leave the village.

Living My Best Life: A $20 Million Daydream

I\'ve been playing a little thought experiment lately: If I had $20 million in the bank, how would I want to live my life? It\'s not about the money per se, but about imagining a life where financial constraints aren\'t the primary driver of my decisions. Here\'s what I\'ve come up with.

On Getting Recognized: The Unexpected Price of Online Success

I never thought I'd be writing about the challenges of being recognized in public. A year ago, I was just another data scientist trying to build connections and establish myself in the field. Now, I'm grappling with the unintended consequences of my growing online presence. Here's how it all unfolded, and what I've learned about the price of distribution in the digital age.

Advice to Young People, The Lies I Tell Myself

I'm really not qualified to give advice.

But enough people DM'd me on Twitter, so here it is. I don't have to answer the same question over and over again. After some more editing I realised that I am actually writing this for my younger sister Katherine.

Losing My Hands

The world was ending, and I couldn't even put my pants on. My hands had cramped up so badly that I couldn't grip a water bottle or type and could barely dress myself. A few weeks earlier, I had been riding the greatest decade-high anyone could have dreamed of. I was moving to New York, making 500k, working for an amazing company, and was engaged in what might be the most lucrative field on the planet. I was doing what I loved, getting paid well, and feeling like I was making a difference. Life was good. Well, as good as it could get during a once-in-a-lifetime pandemic. My name is Jason. I'm a machine learning engineer. And this is how I almost lost my hands.

Picking Metrics and Setting Goals

I think people suck at picking metrics and setting goals. Why? Because they tend to pick metrics they can't actually impact and set goals that leave them feeling empty once they've achieved them. So, let's define some key terms and explore how we can do better.

My year at 1100ng/dL

I'm not a doctor, but I did manage to double my testosterone levels in a year. I'm going to talk about what I did, what I learned, and what I think about it:

1. It's just a fact that male testosterone levels have been dropping for the past couple of years.
2. I felt like I was in a rut and I wanted to feel better, and I did.
3. I was such a psycho about it that I decided to go off the protocol.
4. Despite that, I still think every man should get their levels tested and see if they can improve them. And just understand how they feel.

A Critique on Couches

Here are some fragmented reasons as to why I don't like having a couch.

The couch, often positioned facing a television, symbolizes the societal imposition of a predetermined essence onto our living spaces. This arrangement, reminiscent of Sartre's concept of bad faith, dictates the room's function and restricts its potential. It mirrors the limitations we place upon ourselves when we conform to societal expectations, disregarding our authentic selves.

For real.

Public Baths

Going to American baths is just so weird. I spent my summer in Japan visiting different onsens, and it was both a natural and spiritual experience. Before entering the water, everyone would bathe in the front, and kids would learn from their dads how to bathe. I would often sit on the edges of cliffs, gazing at the water or the sunrise, and it felt like we were monkeys, freely splashing about in nature.

In contrast, the time I spent in LA or New York City at various bathhouses was different. No one looked like an animal; instead, everyone seemed focused on optimization. People barely bathed before entering the water, wearing their dirty little speedos and swim trunks that they had definitely peed in the month before.

Gross.

I used to hate rich people.

This entire piece of writing is dedicated to a recent response on Hacker News. I hope you can see, as a member of reality, that I write this sincerely.

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